I was supposed to start this site in April, National Infertility Awareness month. Then I was supposed to start it in July, just after our one-year anniversary.
It’s October.
Anybody else need to find and join a Procrastinator’s Anonymous group? We’ll do it tomorrow? Ok, sounds good to me.
Anyway my point is that my notebook and phone and brain are full of content. But it’s all from the past 10 months though. Which is not very dynamic at all anymore. So while I will still post video of what an HSG procedure looks and feels like or what supplements we’re on and how they’re helping, what feels best and most authentic at this point is to start with today and go forward.
But first — and as promised on the About Us page — a little more detail of on our story.
And by “more detail” I mean “here’s our list of stats”. Because sometimes reading a lot is hard:
MY STATS
Age (as of the date of publication): 38
Pregnancies: 3 angel babies, all in 2019
Live Children: none
PCOS: No
ENDO: None known
Tubes: 2, both clear
Uterine abnormalities: none
Ovaries: 2, DOR, (AMH 0.7)
Diagnosis: Unexplained Infertility, the most frustrating diagnosis ever in the world in life forever
HUBS’ STATS
Age (as of the date of publication): 36
Live Children: 1, age 10 (I told y’all I’m a stepmom, pray for us)
Male Factor: none
So as you can see, our infertility is my fault. *tosses confetti*
….
I’m joking. It’s no one’s fault. But I do feel the bulk of the [self-imposed] pressure. Especially with the added element of being a stepmom. But I’m learning there does not always have to be blame or even an explanation. Sometimes, things just don’t work out.
Life lessons. Booooooo.
An Unconventional Voice in Fertility
I should also elaborate on this not liking kids thing I mentioned. I absolutely love fat, squishy, munchy-cheek babies. Matter fact, I have been told it is illegal to purposely fatten a baby so I will [half-heartedly] try not to do that to my own (though I make no promises).
My issue is that babies apparently turn into children. Loud, messy, expensive, loud, talkative, touch everything, look-at-me-I’m-doing-a-regular-thing-but-think-it’s-amazing, loud children. Did I mention loud? So therein lies my concern. And I know not ALL kids are that way. But like, 98% of them are. Thankfully, I have been assured that I will actually love my own and I will probably even like them sometimes.
Sidebar: Don’t let the stepmom thing distract you. I’m somewhat of an unconventional stepparent, too. Despite the commonly accepted and astronomically WRONG misconception, stepmoms do not know what we’re signing up for. But we can learn and all work together to create a harmonious living environment for all. *cue birds chirping and butterflies and rainbows* Now, back to the babies thing though…
I used to feel guilt about approaching infertility in such a pragmatic and methodical way. About standing on this platform at all. Like, what right do I have? Surely, someone who is deeply driven by motherhood, who feels they were born to be a mom, should be doing this, right?
Good news. They are. We all should.
My personality and philosophies will resonate with an entirely different audience than that of a softer, more sensitive and sentimental style. There will certainly be no “trigger warnings” here so prepare yourself. God created us all differently and we’re all needed.